Love is like heaven but hurts like hell..

..Love is very much like that.
You can't choose the people you love. You can't choose when to stop loving them or if they love you back. Love takes control of you and blinds you, but does it blind you from the truth or does it blind you to the lies? Only your heart knows that.
Love is forgiving someone that has hurt you to many times. It's never giving up hope for them. It's hard.
And as hard as it may be sometimes, it makes you stronger. And if the love isn't enough to make up for the pain, the person you are after it.. is.
I would never take back any love I've ever given. I would never take back any of the love I've been given. I wouldn't take back the hurt feelings, the nights of tears, the dreams.. the lies. Any of it.
I would only hope that the love I've given them was enough to heal a hurt heart or make a good memory for later.

Love really is like heaven
but it really does hurt like hell.

"Just because somebody doesn't love you the way you want them to,
doesn't mean they don't love you with everything they got.."

Favorite word:

Whimsical. (:

Males I think are Bangin'.

   Henry Cavill- *jizz* <3
Name Unknown- I don't know who this guy is.. but he was my background for quite some time. I found him on a fashion website.. he's a hottie(:
Destery Moore- I love him. End of story.. <3
Dierks Bentely- The boy has got it goin on.. and his voice? -sigh- ;)
Josh Turner- So the fact that he is an insanely gorgeous man is just a plus for me, cause his voice is straight from jebus himself. He gives me shivers. ^-^
Robert Pattinson- I love that movie.. which is why I picked this picture. He can totally pull off the geeky look and still make me happy inside. And I love his voice, singing or just speaking. (:

 Jonathan Rhys Meyer- Okay, so there is definitely something in the water on the set of The Tudors because between Henry Cavill and Jonathan... wow. BANGIN'! <3
ps. I love when he speaks.. his accent is sexy. ;)

 Emile Hirsh- Yay for cuteness!
Aaron Johnson- asdkfjasdklfja, <3 He is way to good for his old lady wife. /:< ps. LOVE this movie!
Ryan Gosling- I don't like The Notebook, but he's the only reason I can make it through it without falling asleep. (:
Chuck Bass- Mmm. (: Ed Westwick- blah.
David Lindsay- He looks really small and young in this, but he's kinda cute when he gets older(:
James McAvoy- He's a cutie and his accent... mmm. Scottland has done me proud with this one. ;D
All four of these lads are delicious in their own way.
Joe Dempsie<3, Mike Bailey, Mitch Hewer, and my personal favorite.. Nicholas Hoult. <3 Skins UK, ftw!<3
Eddie Redmayne- He has the caaaa-uuuutest freckles ever.<3

You make my sick to my stomach.

I've literally NEVER felt this sick to my stomach in my life. And for once, it's not because of my body. I'm humiliated, hurt, and for christ sake.. I'm confused! As if things in my life weren't already crazy enough, today has to happen.
I'm 16. I can't fucking handle this kind of shit! I can't take all this drama.. I'm supposed to be worried about little things like how to get the guy I like to like me back. Figureing out how to drive and stay out past curfew. Not dealing with things most adults don't even deal with.
I don't know how to do this. I know I have to be strong. I know I have to be wise.. but I'm 16. I can't be all that, all the time.
The only thing I've learned today is to never, EVER give someone all of you. Family or not. People need to earn their trust... you can't just give them the benefit of the doubt. You can't forgive someone more than once. You can't love anyone... it just backfires in your face.

God.. I don't even know what I'm saying right now. I just don't know what to feel.. I don't know how to feel really. Today, I was scared. I was shaking and nervous... but I was strong.
But now.. now I'm weak. I'm just. like. you.
WEAK.
I will never, ever put myself in a position where I hurt someone so badly like that. Especially more than one person.. especially someone you "love!" And never for a guy.
I will never steal someone from their family. I will never take away the right to see family. I will never control someone to the point that they aren't themselves.
I will never use someone as a pawn. NEVER. I will never lie so outright that it's pathetic. I will never trust someone as worthless as you. i will never forgive you for what you've done. I will refuse to be anything like you.

You know what's funny.. when I started this. I was weak. I was scared. and I was confused.
But now, now I'm angry. I know what I'm not but I know what I am.
I am not weak. I am strong.
And I am not afraid anymore.
I'm one pissed off girl and I refuse to wait any longer for things to change.
Your time to physically and mentally abuse people, is over. You will never be able to abuse another child in your life. You won't be able to hurt my family anymore. You won't be able to hurt ANYONE. Because as of now,
I want you locked up where you belong. In prison, again, for the rest of your life.

And when that happens, I'll decide on what to do with the other knife so deeply stabbed into my back.

Rad Names

Girls

• Allyshay Makenna
• Willamina Marie
• Belladonna
• Ophelia Rose
• Ellery Lynn
• Nerissa Ember
• Eden Faye
• Nellie Blanche
• Arianna Talon
• Elsie Ashby
• Lola Wren
• Twilla Lane
• Teagen Corina
• Winifred Connor (Conrad)
• Nephele Blair
• Cinder Rose
• Astrid
• Estelle
• Poppy
• Maisie
• Rose

Boys

• Callum Lee
• Liam Shay
• Orson Vaughan
• Esme Vaughan
• Art Fletcher
• Ash Orion
• Griffon Finley
• Lyle Warren
• Auggie Wheeler
• Lane
• Lincoln Reid